Speechless

As I sat down with my faithful laptop and started to wonder what the subject matter should be today, the TV was on a show called Nothing but Trailers.  To my surprise, it wasn’t a new reality show about the secret town where Jerry Springer finds all his guests.  It was actually fifteen commercial-free minutes of movie trailers; but that didn’t invoke the moment of silence I experienced–which was followed directly by, “What the hell was that?!? No seriously, what the hell was that?!?”  There is not much more to say, because I have watched this particular trailer ten times now and still don’t know what to make of it.  This movie was released in February of 2007, but I highly doubt that anyone who reads this blog (hi mom) has ever seen it.  Ladies and gentlemen (sorry, hi dad), I present the trailer for Big Man Japan:

UPDATE:  If you forward this video to anyone, make sure they do not watch the trailer more than ten times.  I made the mistake of watching it for the eleventh time after I was done proofreading; when I awoke on the floor from what I thought was a seizure, my bedroom looked like this:

...I am now convinced that the people at Hello Kitty are trying to take over the world...