Sucks To Be You

I saw a commercial recently (for a product I can’t recall), and it was just some girl talking about having one of those days where everything seems to go right – i.e. you find money in an old jacket pocket, you don’t hit any red lights on your way to work, etc.  Now I’m not saying we all haven’t experienced moments like this, but doesn’t it feel like they are usually few and far between?  More often than not, I’ll have days that feel like the exact opposite – you know, those days where you’re treated like a statue in the park of life.  It’s never fun to be in that position, but one of my creeds, or mottos, or credos is “It could always be worse.”  This mode of thinking is true for anyone who has a roof over their head and food on the table each day - it’s not applicable, however, if you happen to live like this.  So excluding the two-thirds of the population that lives in a third world country, here are a few other stories that are straight out of a crappy Daniel Powter ballad.

Dinner With 53 of Your Closest Friends

“It’s a San Diego Chargers (and perhaps NFL) tradition. The team’s rookie first-rounder is obligated to take the rest of the team out to dinner…This year, Larry English was the lucky rookie.”  Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman claims that English got off “easy” compared to what he spent his rookie year in 2006.  So what was English’s damage? 

I realize the guy is a millionaire, but that tab has got to be hard to stomach – no pun intended. Oh, and Merriman claims his rookie tab totaled $32K. Full Story

Ticket Taker

A motorist in the town of Greece, New York was apprehended by police after participating in what will surely be a costly joyride.  Police initially clocked Joshua Bracci at 111 mph on a local road, and attempted to pull him over for excessive speeding.  Joshua was apparently feeling lucky, and decided to lead police on a 13 minute chase that eventually lead to his arrest – and 56 tickets.  I am not talking about Chuck E. Cheese money either, Bracci was issued 56 charges from the Greece PD that included “first-degree reckless endangerment and first-degree aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle, both felonies, driving while intoxicated, reckless driving, unlawfully fleeing police, resisting arrest, criminal mischief, leaving the scene of an accident”…and 48 more.  I don’t know much about the case, but I see him claiming The Fast and The Furious or maybe the Need for Speed defense.  Full Story

South Africa’s Internet Speed is for the Birds

“A South African information technology company on Wednesday proved it was faster for them to transmit data with a carrier pigeon than to send it using Telkom, the country’s leading internet service provider…The 11-month-old pigeon, Winston, took one hour and eight minutes to fly the 80 km (50 miles) from Unlimited IT’s offices near Pietermaritzburg to the coastal city of Durban with a data card (that) was strapped to his leg.  Including downloading, the transfer took two hours, six minutes and 57 seconds — the time it took for only four percent of the data to be transferred using a Telkom line.”  Full Story