You’re an important American. I’m not talking about some type of motherfucker that Earl Pitts raves about either. I am not talking about the fool who came up with the 8,000 calorie, deep fried Oreo taco salad burrito bigger than your ass. I’m talking about someone who did something that others find magnanimous – that [...]
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. A riveting drama about a particularly perfect cut piece of Spam with a beard, who turns to a gang to fulfill the void left by an absentee father. Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin went on tour this past weekend to get Republicanism off their chests, and served as the [...]
Have you ever been sober around a bunch of your friends – normally you’re the one who is drunker than Barney Gumble after being at Moe’s – and wondered why you ever found any of their conversations interesting, tolerable or even intelligible? When you’re stone cold sober, the obligatory encounter with the sentimental drunk can [...]
For some reason, Dr. Thomas always has a craving for donuts after finishing a hemorrhoidectomy. If a family member picks a bad day to stop breathing, some unwritten law somewhere says friends and acquaintances must ply you with caloric wares. Apparently death makes survivors hungry. If you don’t believe me, see the story about them [...]
